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Everything seems to mount up, after a while. You think you can cope - with being depressed, being bullied, being a fucking tranny - but you can't. In the end, they always win. They wear you down. You can resist - *I* can resist as much as I like, but it doesn't make a scrap of difference.I just want to crawl under a rock and never emerge.***That night, I don't sleep at all. I just lie there, all night, thinking. I don't cut myself; something tells me it's got a bit beyond that now.***In the morning I pack my bag in a daze, not really concentrating on what I'm doing. Everything suddenly seems so simple; for the first time in my entire life, I am totally calm. For the first time in months, I don't secrete a razor inside my coat. It'd just be pointless.If the events of the past few days - fuck it! The events of my entire fucking life - have taught me anything, it's that there's no point standing up to Them. They're always bigger than you, always stronger than you, and. Mene apne football player ke sath match khelna ka fantacy use bata di. Aur use balcony se un teeno player ko dikha dia. Fir kyat ha. Usne us teeno player ke satha mera match setting kar li. Aur mera footbaal match fix ho gai.Raat ko bara baje mujhe football ground jana tha. Wao teeno jaise mera hi intazar kar rahe the. Mejhe dekhte hi bhooke sero ki tarah mujh par tuth pare. Teen jawan larke. Uffff … halki barish ho rahi thi. Aur barish me kapre utar ke footbaal khelne ka maza kuch aur hi hai. He he he he…..kabhi khela hai football barish me? Huuuu Aaaa ………Me football ground me nangi leti hu apne tanga fela kar apne goolpost dikha. Yeh dekh kar wao to pagal ho gaye. Wao teeno apas me larne lage ki sabse pahale penalty kaun lega. Uffff. Me to dar gayi ki wao marpith na suru kar de. Mene bola are ruko. Me batati hu ki kaun kya karega. Aaaooo…… aaaoooo mere Pele, tu mere piche se le le. Arur mene Ronaldo ko boli, agar khara hua hai to mere goal post me dal do. Maradona thora gusse me aa.
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